All That College and I Want McDonald’s Wage

*Disclaimer I am aware that this was probably supposed to say $13 an hour but either way that’s high and this whole post is shenanigans:

We spend a lot of time everyday scrolling and trolling. So, I am scrolling through Facebook and boom a McDonald’s sign that says, “Starting $31 an hour”. Hold the mf phone, say what? and where?

Here we are in 2021, we have been through hell, I understand. We have had to figure out how to connect with other humans from a distance, how to educate the kids from home, and how to survive with no job. We had money thrown at us from the government like alimony from an ex-husband. We have lost many lives and been through multiple DIFFERENT revolutions.

If you are like me, you are tired, and of course everything is uncertain still with COVID producing more variants than the Kardashian’s produce children. We are prepared for anything at this point (who knew the survivalist who kept ready for the end of the world were not so crazy). We don’t all agree about what to do or how to do it when it comes to these unforeseen times, but we can all agree it has been a fn dumpster fire!

Literally the entire country is hiring, and though it is scary out there right now, if we don’t fill these jobs, we can never get back to any semblance of normalcy. Hear me out: the stores that used to be open 24 hours (a luxury I really took for granted) are now open until 10:30 and have less staff than ever. Restaurants close at 9pm because staffing is too hard. We all had to stop our lives abruptly and live a different life. And even I do some work from home. We learned to be creative, to communicate in new and exciting ways and even learned about the people who live in our home. We were forced to reconnect with the ones closest to us, and realized how important both slowing down and increasing technology is in our lives.

But ladies and gentlemen if McDonald’s is offering $31 an hour, I think it is time we go back to work. Like, think about it, who held us down when everything closed: Fast food y’all. So, unless you are trying to purposely play the next round of quarantine as unemployed and take a chance that they may hand y’all more money, go get a job and if you want flexible hours check out fast food, they need you and so do those of us that eat it.

So, yeah, now I gotta find this McDonald’s, pack up the kids again and move again to work at McDonald’s…It’s the clear answer to my success, three college degrees and I want McDonald’s salary. Lawd, y’all should pray for me, never in my stars have I ever thought I would make less than McDonald’s hourly. Going back to my roots in fast food. So, my question is… do y’all want fries with that?

Peace, Love and Applesauce,

Jill Marie

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